Last week while gardening I got bit by a poisonous spider on my left thumb. My hand swelled to the size of Donald Trump’s head. I know, I know. I’m picking on the guy. But when I have such juicy material to work with, I simply can’t resist.Anyway, when the swelling appeared to cut off my circulation, I drove myself to the emergency room. At this point my hand was as hot as a fire iron and crimson red. I can’t tell you how scary and painful it was. Long story short, I’m now typing this blog with one less thumb.
Okay, okay, I’m lying. Need I remind you I said you won’t believe this? Well, I wasn’t lying about that. Unless you actually fell for my story and felt bad I lost my thumb. In that case, I’m sorry you’re gullible.Continue reading →
I’ve been playing competitive team tennis for 30 years now. Whew…that’s an awful long time, isn’t it? But here’s the thing; something is wrong with me.Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not dying. At least I don’t think so. I am behind on scheduling my annual checkup though, so until that happens, I can’t say definitively that I’m not dying.Anyway, I digress…for those of you who know me, you won’t argue that something is wrong with me. I don’t mean I see dead people or anything. But wouldn’t that be awesome? I’d love to visit with my family who’ve passed on, maybe even meet Mark Twain, Jane Goodall or Einstein. Scratch that last one; I probably wouldn’t understand a word he’s saying. There I go digressing again…
So Wednesday morning I’m on the freeway bringing kittens to get spayed and neutered at a local veterinary clinic. Naturally, I’m late because the freeway is a parking lot.
In the back of my SUV, 7 of the 11 kittens we rescued from Kern County are serenading me with a chorus of meows.
What lucky kitties. Our feral cat rescue rarely deals with domestics but when we learned these were scheduled to be euthanized for lack of adopters, we decided to help. And that’s how I found myself on the freeway Wednesday morning. Continue reading →
Last week my friend Joan had a birthday, so 8 of our friends met for dinner to celebrate at Marin Joe’s. They have great steaks (if you enjoy eating things that once had a face), tasty pastas and assorted fresh seafood. Can’t lose, right?
Normally I’d answer in the affirmative had I not recently made the mistake of reading a survey Food Network conducted about chef secrets. Admittedly, my timing was poor. Did I really want to know their sordid tales right before dinner? Uh…yes I did.
Now don’t get me wrong; my new-found knowledge didn’t stop me from enjoying my meal. It’s no secret I love to eat. (Hey, thighs don’t lie.) I’m not saying Joe’s is guilty of any of the following but here’s what I learned: Continue reading →
Guess what I did last weekend? I’ll give you a hint. It was not in the least bit fun. In fact, it was torture but it had to be done. Just one of those inevitabilities one simply can’t ignore. And believe me, I tried to for 4 months.
I’m sure right about now you’re asking yourself what the heck I’m talking about. So here goes: I just completed my tax return for 2014. Go ahead, judge me. I don’t blame you. In all the years I’ve been paying taxes (over 40) I’ve never needed an extension until this year. (Insert shameful head bow here.)Now don’t get me wrong; I’m generally responsible. I always pay my bills on time, see the dentist twice a year, regularly change the oil in my car, and never drive without wearing a seat belt. So how did I, completely out of character, end up doing taxes on September 29th?