A Chatty Cat

(This blog was originally posted on October 6, 2013 and Oliver is still as chatty as ever.)

There’s a snake loose in my home. I know this because my chatty cat, Oliver, informed me. I heard him calling me from clear across the house. So naturally, I went to see what all the chatter was about.

Actually, Oliver brought me two snakes, but luckily I managed to grab one and rush it across the street to “Rodent Knoll.” That’s the area where I generally release the gifts my cat so graciously brings me. Math is not my strong suit but I believe that means one snake is still slithering aimlessly inside my house.

Rodent Knoll
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Getting Healthy – Not Me, My Pets

I’ve been making meals for myself for 15 years now. No more planning dinners for my significant other since I no longer have one. My ex was a meat eater and I’m not, so I cooked him a typical Midwest meal of meat and potatoes with a side of vegetables thrown in for good measure. I, on the other hand, enjoy anything without a face, like my roasted tomato-vegetable casserole, salad on the side.

Oh, how times have changed. Once I’d acclimated to cooking dinner only when I felt like it (even though my ex never expected me to cook for him), I’d just wing it. For instance, I’d simply enjoy cheese and crackers followed by fruit with yogurt. Or maybe I’d have breakfast for dinner, something my dad always enjoyed.

Dad at Sand Harbor in Lake Tahoe
Dear old Dad

So now I’m back to cooking for those in my home who depend on me for their daily sustenance — my 10 pets. They’re the opposite of my ex in that they expect and actually insist I make their meals. It better be ready at 9 a.m. and 6 p.m., respectively, or I’m gonna hear about it. Most of my pets aren’t much larger than a bread box (am I dating myself?) and since I definitely am larger, one would imagine they’d think twice before being so demanding.

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Wouldn’t Have It Any Other Way

By now you know I live with 10 pets — three dogs and seven cats.

Notice I didn’t say they live with ME because in reality I live with THEM. And boy do they know it. I’m a bit outnumbered, especially with my cats. So consequently, what I want is of no interest to them. My purpose in their eyes? Make sure their bellies are full, and to accommodate them, use no more than the very edge of my king size bed.

Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not complaining. And lest you think otherwise, I’m actually sane (although it may not seem that way to petless people). But that’s fine with me. You’re entitled to your opinion, however erroneous it may be. Fortunately, I don’t fault you for it.

I’ve lived alone now for nearly 15 years, if having a ton of pets can be considered living alone. I guess I should say I’m the only human in my house. It was my first time going solo since I left my parents home to share a rental with Sharon.

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Don’t Leave Home Without It

I can’t believe I’m old enough to say this but back in the day I didn’t have a cell phone in my purse whenever I left the house. That’s because they weren’t invented yet. Unlike today, I was able to function just fine without staying connected every second of every day to every human being I know. If I needed to talk to someone I waited until I got home to dial them from our rotary phone.

beige phone 2

Yep, my family had a dial-up phone ages ago. Now don’t get me wrong; I wasn’t around in the day of switchboards like on the Andy Griffith Show where Andy has to ask switchboard operator, Sarah, to ring Aunt Bee for him. Please, I’m not THAT old!

andy griffith

Anyway, our phone was beige with a long coiled cord that stretched from the kitchen nook into the dining room where we sat and gabbed. But for many years prior, the cord was only 2 feet long so we had to stand to talk. This was also the day of party lines. Know about those?

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Gone Girl

By now you all know I have another cat, Piper. She’s been proving to be quite the character. Already a foodie, she often pushes herself past the other cats, each waiting at their respective bowls for yours truly to fill them. Sadly, patience is not Piper’s strong suit.

Having yet to figure out which bowl is hers, or that I feed the cats in order of seniority, Piper is last to eat and is none too happy about it. Old man Oliver goes first but she dives her head into his bowl, promptly receiving a swat that says, “Don’t even think about it.”

Piper then moves on to Fat Jack who in no way looks like a cat who wants to share. Dash could care less and lets her eat but I inevitably place her at her own bowl.

Only Mango preferred not to be photographed

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