The Art of Cursing

Originally posted in 2021

I never swore until I was out of my teens. Pretty shocking, huh? Let’s just say I was a good girl with my verbiage for most of my early years. As a kid, I never had to suck on a bar of soap like my sister did after being busted for swearing. I did, however, thoroughly enjoy watching her do so. Actually, I shocked myself the first time the word shit slipped from my lips. It felt wrong while at the same time strangely satisfying.

Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not some potty-mouthed person who is addicted to swearing. Please! I’m a nice Catholic girl who attended Church twice a year (Christmas and Easter) and now only for weddings and funerals. Hey, I never said I was perfect.

Having said that, there’s something satisfying about cursing. When someone cuts me off on the freeway, darn it! just doesn’t cut it, you know? In the privacy of my vehicle, where nobody can hear me, I say what I imagine a truck driver might exclaim under similar circumstances. I’m guessing it’s pretty much a regular occurrence in that occupation.

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You Won’t Believe This

Last week while gardening I got bit by a poisonous spider on my left thumb. My hand swelled to the size of Donald Trump’s head. I know, I know. I’m picking on the guy. But when I have such juicy material to work with, I simply can’t resist.

spider thumb

Anyway, when the swelling appeared to cut off my circulation, I drove myself to the emergency room. At this point my hand was as hot as a fire iron and crimson red. I can’t tell you how scary and painful it was. Long story short, I’m now typing this blog with one less thumb.

Okay, okay, I’m lying. Need I remind you I said you won’t believe this? Well, I wasn’t lying about that. If you actually fell for my story and felt bad I lost my thumb, I’m sorry you’re gullible.

gullible
Continue reading →

You Won’t Believe This

Last week while gardening I got bit by a poisonous spider on my left thumb. My hand swelled to the size of Donald Trump’s head. I know, I know. I’m picking on the guy. But when I have such juicy material to work with, I simply can’t resist.spider thumbAnyway, when the swelling appeared to cut off my circulation, I drove myself to the emergency room. At this point my hand was as hot as a fire iron and crimson red. I can’t tell you how scary and painful it was. Long story short, I’m now typing this blog with one less thumb.

Okay, okay, I’m lying. Need I remind you I said you won’t believe this? Well, I wasn’t lying about that. Unless you actually fell for my story and felt bad I lost my thumb. In that case, I’m sorry you’re gullible.gullible Continue reading →

You Won’t Believe This

Last week while gardening I got bit by a poisonous spider on my left thumb. My hand swelled to the size of Donald Trump’s head. I know, I know. I’m picking on the guy. But when I have such juicy material to work with, I simply can’t resist.spider thumbAnyway, when the swelling appeared to cut off my circulation, I drove myself to the emergency room. At this point my hand was as hot as a fire iron and crimson red. I can’t tell you how scary and painful it was. Long story short, I’m now typing this blog with one less thumb.

Okay, okay, I’m lying. Need I remind you I said you won’t believe this? Well, I wasn’t lying about that. Unless you actually fell for my story and felt bad I lost my thumb. In that case, I’m sorry you’re gullible.gullible Continue reading →