Author Archives: Janet

The Essentials in Life

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essentials

The longer one lives, the more one learns. At least that’s what I hear. But this has not exactly been my experience. Some of us didn’t get that memo so we’re still learning. And by us I mean me. I’m rapidly gaining ground on 63 yet I’m still realizing some essentials in life. You probably think I should know them all by now, wouldn’t you? Sadly, no. Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not a total loss. There are things I’ve learned. For instance…

One should always floss.

Brushing and not flossing is like taking a shower without using soap. What’s the point? You don’t think some of that ham sandwich you had for lunch is wedged between your molars? Think again. Flossing keeps your gums healthy, which keeps your pearly whites in your mouth. So basically, flossing keeps you from becoming toothless. Keep your teeth people!

flossing 2

Don’t buy the $7 a month Direct TV receiver insurance.

But if you do, like I did, just know that the month you cancel is the exact month your receiver will stop working. Never mind that you forgot you ever signed up in the first place, 9 YEARS AGO, because you never check your bill and could have bought multiple receivers by now with that $930. Generally speaking, extended warranties are not considered cost effective. You’re welcome.

Direct TV receiver

My $930 receiver

Just know that once you buy a new car, someone is going to ding your door in the Safeway parking lot. Continue reading →

Girls Week

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BNP sign

Every year in March my tennis friends and I head down to Palm Desert for the BNP Paribas professional tennis tournament. All the biggies are there; the best of the tennis world. It’s like attending a Grand Slam but only an hour flight from home. Yep, 6 glorious days of sun, fun, food, drinking, shopping, swimming, hot tubbing and of course, tennis.

bnp

With work and having 8 animals, I don’t get away too often. So when March rolls around, I get desert fever. But as soon as I pull out my suitcase, my dogs go into moping mode, lying on the bed watching forlornly while I pack.

My mutts are no dummies. They know when I’m leaving so might very well benefit from anti-depressants mixed in with their kibble. Instead, I try to trick them by packing when they’re not around. Now don’t get me wrong; they still seem to sense it. Like I said…they’re no dummies.

skip with callie

She’s leaving, isn’t she?

Continue reading →

Snowboarding: An Old Dog Learns a New Trick

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Originally posted in 2013

I was in my early 40s, waiting in a drugstore for a prescription, when I decided to use those 15 minutes and have my wrist scanned to determine my bone density. It was either that or shop for light bulbs. Decisions, decisions…So I get in line with a half-dozen women in their 60s. Confident I’d pass with flying colors, I hoped the technician wouldn’t embarrass me by his excited announcement (within ear shot of the others) that I had the bones of a 25-year-old.

Shortly thereafter, my fantasy faded and reality slapped me to my senses. Not only did I not have young bones but I was pulled aside and advised to speak with my doctor about getting a full hip and spine scan. Apparently, the results showed my bones were under the mistaken impression I was 65. Continue reading →

I’m an Idiot

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Last week I wrote about my being a genius. But this week I’m here to tell you I’m an idiot. How quickly the tide turns, huh? And in this particular case, live and learn did not prove to be exactly, how shall I say…correct? In fact, I’m finding that living and learning do not always go hand in hand.

Live and learn

I often type these blog posts on my laptop so I’m not shackled to my office computer. I can watch TV and type, be on the phone and type, sit in the garden and type. You get my drift. There are obvious benefits to working this way, especially when multi-tasking.

One of the things you should know about me is that I’m not tech savvy in any shape or form. It’s just one of the ways I’m an idiot. Therefore, I’m a bit skeptical of suggestions like downloads and updates, stuff like that. Normally I ignore them until my computer barely functions anymore. Only then do I consider the latest updates. Call me stubborn.

stubborn Continue reading →

Apparently I’m a Genius

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Well it’s official. I can finally divulge what I really am. No, I’m not a man in a woman’s body. But nice try. And I’m not in the Witness Protection Program, hoping that my former life and real name, Shannon Miller, is all in the past. Wouldn’t that be something though? If so, I’d now be back in hiding, having just blown my cover.

witness protection program

So no, my news isn’t quite that exciting. But here it is:

Last week I learned I’m a genius.

I know…it came as a surprise to me as well. Those who know me can attest that I’m not the brainy type. I’m more the flighty and absentminded type. In high school I was more interested in being with friends and playing sports. I honestly don’t remember studying much. Did I do it at the kitchen table? In my bedroom? Could it be I don’t remember because I rarely studied? That would be my guess.

study desk

Doesn’t look familiar

In college, I received my bachelor’s degree with a 3.2 GPA, which is basically a B. Not bad, but definitely not genius. Especially since I wasn’t particularly enthralled with my major, Social Welfare. How can an 18-year-old be expected to know what she wants to do for the rest of her life?

confused

Continue reading →