The Squeaky Wheel Gets the Grease

Anyone who knows me is aware of my trials and tribulations with technology. Let’s call it a love/hate relationship. Of late let’s just say it’s leaning toward the latter.

Now don’t get me wrong; I do love my computer and all it has to offer. Take Google for instance. I’m from the era where research meant visiting the library to look through a multitude of books, searching microfiche or thumbing through volumes of index cards….time consuming and tediously boring necessities when seeking information.

Today Google simply tells us whatever we need to know. What’s not to love? Instant answers are at our fingertips. That’s exhilarating. Depending on how fast you type, you can have your answer within seconds. It’s actually quite remarkable, don’t you think?

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Winston: The Not So Friendly Ghost

My home is possessed.

Now don’t get me wrong; I haven’t witnessed a shimmering white image at the foot of my bed in the wee hours of the night. You know I rarely sleep anymore so I’m often awake during prime ghost hours (presumably 2-3 a.m.). Anyway, what self-respecting spirit manifests himself when his intended target is wide awake? Sorta takes the excitement away from scaring me out of a deep slumber, wouldn’t you say?

boo

I’ve named my homebound spirit Winston and I’d love to meet him, if not to simply wring his neck. I imagine, though, it might be difficult to strangle a vaporous white cloud. Still, I’d like to try. The fact is, my annoying heavenly spirit has attempted to get my attention for quite a while before finally succeeding. Well done, Winston.

Turns out my earthly ghost messes with most of my techie gadgets, like Direct TV, computer, cell phone, GPS, portable speakerphone, even my Fitbit. You name it, if it’s electronic, he bewitches it just for yours truly. And to him I say:

thoughtful

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The Essentials in Life

essentials

The longer one lives, the more one learns. At least that’s what I hear. But this has not exactly been my experience. Some of us didn’t get that memo so we’re still learning. And by us I mean me. I’m rapidly gaining ground on 63 yet I’m still realizing some essentials in life. You probably think I should know them all by now, wouldn’t you? Sadly, no. Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not a total loss. There are things I’ve learned. For instance…

One should always floss.

Brushing and not flossing is like taking a shower without using soap. What’s the point? You don’t think some of that ham sandwich you had for lunch is wedged between your molars? Think again. Flossing keeps your gums healthy, which keeps your pearly whites in your mouth. So basically, flossing keeps you from becoming toothless. Keep your teeth people!

flossing 2

Don’t buy the $7 a month Direct TV receiver insurance.

But if you do, like I did, just know that the month you cancel is the exact month your receiver will stop working. Never mind that you forgot you ever signed up in the first place, 9 YEARS AGO, because you never check your bill and could have bought multiple receivers by now with that $930. Generally speaking, extended warranties are not considered cost effective. You’re welcome.

Direct TV receiver

My $930 receiver

Just know that once you buy a new car, someone is going to ding your door in the Safeway parking lot. Continue reading