Category Archives: Humor

What’s Going On Here?

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Something is going on. The past couple months I’ve noticed an exorbitant amount of people I know getting injured. Have you noticed the same? A friend of mine who’s into astrology says the reason might be because Mercury is in retrograde.

Mercury Retrograde

Now don’t get me wrong; I know nothing about astrology except that my birth sign is Cancer the Crab. And that’s the extent of it. So naturally I have absolutely no idea what mercury in retrograde means. I had to look it up. Cutting to the chase, let’s just say it means it’s a time for fated events.

cancer crab

So I wondered, are all these injuries fated? In a word, nope. Because turns out retrograde doesn’t happen until April 28, at 1:20 p.m. to be precise. That still leaves me with the question, what’s going on here? Continue reading →

I Juice Detoxed and Lived to Tell

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The fact that you’re reading this is proof I didn’t kill myself on this, my 9th day into my juice cleanse. And I’ve not killed anyone else either. Of this I’m quite proud. You see, I wasn’t so sure what would happen when I began my attempt to dislodge myself from craving sugar and get back on track with better eating habits. Let’s just say I figured it would be ugly.

juicing

…and nobody died

When I began, I expected to be ridiculously cranky going through withdrawals by juicing throughout the day, although eating a dinner of vegetables. The later hasn’t been that tough since the last time I ate meat was April 11, 1990.

Paul McCartney once said if slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be vegetarian. I saw through the glass wall that April day and that did it for me. (I’ll spare you a photo. You’re welcome.) Now back to my cleanse…

Paul-McCartney-Glass-Walls-511150

Continue reading →

Welcome To My Detox

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Okay here’s the thing. I’ve been a bad girl with what I’ve been sticking into my mouth. Wait! I should put that another way: Lately I’ve been eating poorly. How’s that?

I do a ton of baking around the holidays, this year being no exception. If you think I didn’t sample one or more of the 43 pumpkin-cranberry breads I made, then you might be lacking in common sense.

platters

Now don’t get me wrong. I sampled more than just the breads. Naturally, I had to “taste test” my fair share of the peppermint/chocolate cookies, Ritz crackers filled with peanut butter then dipped in chocolate (tastes divine) and the pretzels topped with caramel and again dipped in chocolate — to mention just a few. Continue reading →

You Don’t Know Jack

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Jack, my recently adopted 4th cat, will be my last. I won’t be guardian to more felines until one of mine goes over the Rainbow Bridge. And it’s not because I’m afraid of being a crazy cat lady. That boat sailed a while ago.

miss crazy cat lady

No, the reason I’m stopping after Jack is because, well, you don’t know Jack. And as it turns out, I didn’t either. Now don’t get me wrong; I wouldn’t change my decision to add Jack to my animal family. It’s just that the more I get to know him, his true personality emerges. Need I say more? (Well actually, yes, or I won’t have a blog post today.) Continue reading →

A Year in the Life of a Blogger

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Hard to believe I’ve been penning this blog since November, 2012. In case you suck at math, that’s 169 blog posts at once a week. That’s a lot of posts. Just between you and me, sometimes I wonder if I’ll run out of words. Although, as you’ve probably discovered, days when I have little to say hardly ever happen.

I don’t write about anything life changing or probably even interesting, mind you. It’s all mainly humorous observations about my life. That’s a quote from my About Me page, which you’d know had you read it. No worries.

I forgive you

If I’m being honest here, I have to admit I didn’t post a new entry every Sunday. And the reason I know this? Because I get a stat report at the end of each year from WordPress. You can’t believe the stuff they track. Don’t worry, nobody’s stalking how often you read my blog. That would just be creepy. I don’t actually know my readers’ identities unless they comment. (Hint, hint.) Continue reading →